The Sweet Swear Jar

A short story by @fatijaoui //

The Sweet Swear Jar

Joshua was known for his coarse language and unflinching honesty. Despite her expectations, Helen, his wife, remained hopeful that this tendency would wane with the arrival of their first child. On the other hand, Helen had an undeniable sweet tooth, much to the dismay of Joshua, who detested the sight of candies, chocolate bars, and other sugary confections in the kitchen or on her bedside table.

Joshua was prone to heated disagreements with customers and superiors at the garage where he had worked since graduating high school. His gruff demeanor and quick temper made interactions challenging at times. Yet, despite this, he was never considered for termination. Joshua was the premier mechanic in the state, renowned for his training abilities and unmatched skills. So skilled was he that many of his protégés left to start their own shops, but this was not necessarily a bad thing for the garage. They often referred clients to Joshua when they couldn't resolve a problem. Joshua had a mind like a sponge and would absorb knowledge about cars through podcasts, audiobooks, and shows, retaining every word with ease.

Helen secured a position as a receptionist at a medical practice after covering for her aunt Betty during sick days and vacations. With her aunt's retirement, she finally had a full-time job. This newfound stability alleviated her concerns about Joshua's complaints about being the sole financial provider and his criticism of her spending. She daydreamed about the treats she could purchase with her own earnings.

At the start of their relationship, the reasons for their mutual affection were not entirely clear, but their love was undeniable. Yet, they were acutely aware of each other's quirks and irritations. Despite the frequent arguments, they viewed them as an inherent part of their relationship, a demonstration of honesty rather than a negative aspect.

Becoming a mother to Bella was a formidable experience for Helen, and despite her confidence in initiating arguments, she struggled to ask for help. The comfort she derived from sweets helped her navigate this new chapter. To avoid waking Joshua during the night, she placed a mattress in Bella's room and slept there. After two weeks of being at home, she received a call from her mother offering to babysit Bella while she returned to work. This arrangement continued until Bella's first year of school.

For Joshua, life carried on as usual, with only the occasional reminder of Bella's presence in the form of diapers and messes. During Bella's first day of school, Helen was tearful, while Joshua became frustrated and left early for work. Upon arrival, a colleague inquired about Bella's absence since she usually spent her Mondays in the shop with them. In response, Joshua tersely told him to mind his own business. No one dared to tease or joke with Joshua, and the colleague quickly backed off. It was widely known that Joshua was not to be trifled with.

It had only been a month since Bella started school when her teacher requested a meeting with Helen and Joshua. Though Helen suspected the reason for the meeting, she kept it to herself, wary of sparking an argument with Joshua who appeared unaware of the situation. Joshua picked up Helen from work, and they arrived at Bella's classroom, where the teacher asked them to follow him to a nearby office. The teacher began by expressing gratitude for their attendance and then brought to their attention some concerns regarding Bella's vocabulary in class.

Joshua's face reddened, but he had promised Helen not to cause a scene in front of the teacher, so he remained silent. However, as soon as they got into the car, he exploded. 'Are you kidding me right now?' he said after Helen asked him to say something. 'What are you talking about? You didn't say a word to defend her in there, so why are we even talking about it now?’ After that, the silence in the car was charged with tension. Joshua drove Helen back to work while she tried to keep herself together, battling her racing thoughts. After dropping her off, Joshua went back to the shop while Helen sat at her desk and started searching for ways to help Bella stop using bad words.

The same evening, before dinner, Helen pulled Josh into the pantry and whispered to him, "Listen to me, I don't want Bella to keep hearing you curse all day. So, I came up with this - a swear jar. Every time you say a bad word in front of her, you have to put a dollar in here. Please, you heard the teacher, she's smart and very capable. So now, let's act like freaking parents, okay? I don't want to put her future in danger." Joshua replied, "I'll only accept if you put a dollar every time you eat sweets in front of her. Sugar is bad for you." Helen agreed and they established the swear jar rule for both of them.

Bella was helping with the dishes when she dropped a fork and let out a cuss word. Helen gave Joshua the stink eye until he realized it was his turn to step in. He took Bella by the hand and sat her down for a talk about the type of language she should not be using. He stumbled through the conversation until Helen jumped in. "Listen here, Bella. We've all been guilty of throwing out some not so nice words from time to time. But the word you used just now, that's not the kinda talk we want to hear from you. We know you hear us saying those words and it seems okay to repeat them, but it’s not, honey. So from now on, your dad and I, we're gonna watch our language and if we slip up, we gotta put a buck in this jar for every swear word we say." Helen let Joshua continue, "And, sweetie, candy, chocolate, and sugar, they ain't your friends either. So, if your mother or I eat any of that junk, we gotta throw a buck in the jar too." He didn't single her out for her own sugar habits, and she couldn't help but admire him for that.

They found that the swear jar was filled to the brim each and every month. After several months of this experiment, Helen and Joshua decided to put the money in a savings account for Bella. Helen made an effort to reduce her sugar intake, as she wanted to set a good example for her daughter. Even if he didn't swear in front of Bella, Joshua made it a point to put money in the jar before heading to work. To his surprise, he felt more relaxed and less stressed since they started the experiment. He found himself using foul language less frequently. His coworkers even noticed the change and commented on how much more enjoyable he was to be around. Helen had a private stash of sweets and chocolate in the garage where she would indulge when everyone was asleep and she would then put a dollar in the jar for each sweet she had eaten.

Joshua would teach Bella about the curse words she wasn’t allowed to use in the car every morning on their way to school. He would tell her what alternative language she should use instead. Bella loved her curse words lessons and swore to her dad to only tell her mom when she’d turn 18. Their private sessions in the car was always full of laughter and it made Joshua realize how stupid some swear words were after Bella gave her feedback.

Bella's journal was a cherished part of her daily routine, where she'd jot down notes about her day and the lessons she learned in school before going to bed. But beneath her bed lay a secret, a box that held a little red book, "The Swear Book," that she'd pieced together from scraps of paper and bound with a thread. Every night, after her parents said goodnight, she'd excitedly reach for the box and open the book, which contained all the swear words she'd ever heard. Beside each word, she'd write a description of the context in which it was used and the series of events that led to it, as well as an alternative, a more acceptable word or phrase she could say in school and at home as taught by her father. The thrill of understanding a new swear word context and writing a definition of it or a word-for-word dialogue filled her with immense joy.

Years later, Helen and Joshua donned their finest attire and made their way to their daughter Bella's graduation ceremony. As Bella strode across the stage to accept her doctorate in Linguistics, they couldn't help but feel a rush of pride. And then, their eyes landed on the book Bella was clutching in her hand. It was a red volume with a picture of a jar overflowing with dollar bills and coins, the title read "The Sweet Swear: The Evolution of Foul Language in History." The couple exchanged a knowing smile, remembering the days of the "swear jar" and the journey it took them on. As Bella began her acceptance speech, they listened intently, proud of the woman and linguist their daughter had become.

AUTHOR : FATIMA MOUDJAOUI

FEBRUARY 2023

LAST EDITS: 02/07/2023